Greetings Fellow Jimmies,
The Mexico Open was being played at Vidanta Villarta for nearly US$8 million in prize money over the weekend and some bloke called John Rahm shot a 61!
More importantly, on Saturday, Jimmy's Kitchen Golfing Society hosted the prestigious 2022 GOTY Final Round on the Hong Kong Golf Club's Eden Course, to decide the winner of this grueling nine round tournament which teed off with GOTY 1 on 30 July 2022 and climaxed with GOTY 9 on 29 April 2023.
GOTY 9
On the big day, a field of 19 Jimmies actually teed off on the Eden in 1 three ball and 4 four-ball flights, secured by 5 elves on the previous Saturday, the 22nd.
It was almost not so, as Hoser volunteered for and then pulled out of elfing, leaving Lurch to nobly take his place on the 22nd, even though Lurch would be in Scotland on the 29th. If that was not the selfless act of a true future President, then I don't know what is.
Then one of the 5 elves who did turn up booked a tee time on the wrong course! Shocking enough in itself, but all the more so as it was Orange Roughy, one of our PPFLs of all people :0 ! Fortunately, your President was able to salvage the situation, albeit not without difficulty.
Finally, another Jimmy, I Suspect you know who, withdrew when he saw his tee time, leaving the President to find a replacement at short notice. Luckily, Nadger was keen to step in and we were back to 20 players in 5 flights on the right course.
But then Pecker pulled his hamstring playing cricket on Friday the 28th, so we were back to 19. Luckily, or so your Prez thought, Chubb's flight to the USA was deferred and he stepped in to fill the vacant spot, boosting us to 20 again, before being taken ill and having to withdraw, leaving us with 19 to actually tee off.
GOTY 9 Results
Not only did Penny place all the 6 skill prize flags on the right holes, but also Chambermaid returned all 6 flags intact to the President. To cap it all, the names of all 6 skill prize winners were legible, so they could be decided without incident! Such efficiency is almost unheard of!
Nearest the pins on the 2nd, 5th and 17th holes were won by Chambermaid, Muffin and Grease Nipple respectively.
Nearest the pin in two on the 14th hole went to Hoser.
Longest drives on the 7th and 14th were both smashed by Nadger.
Muffin had first birdie on the 3rd.
Grease Nipple had last birdie on the 17th.
Your Prez won best front 9 with 21 points, on count back from Orange Roughy.
Chambermaid won best back 9 with 19 points.
Grease Nipple, McWu and Swivel all scored 36 points.
However, Swivel only scored 17 on the back 9, so he was 3rd.
Grease Nipple and McWu both scored 18 on the back 9 but Grease Nipple scored 12 on the last 6, while McWu scored 11 on those holes.
So, Grease Nipple was declared winner of GOTY 9, with McWu in 2nd place.
Duffer was Broadband with 21 points, much to the relief of Write Off, who initially reported a score of 19 off a handicap of 20 before realizing that he was playing off 23 and had therefore scored 22 to edge above the danger zone by a stroke.
2022 Golfer of the Year
So much for GOTY 9, but The Final, is decided by the grand total of the best 5 scores of each Jimmy out of the 9 GOTY events. So it was more about who could gain the most points by outscoring the worst of their 5 respective scores after the first 8 rounds of GOTY.
In great golfing conditions, no less than 11 out of the 13 already qualified Jimmies, who were playing in GOTY 9, managed to improve their total GOTY total scores, which was very good.
Of the top 8 golfers at the start of the day, Shrek, Chambermaid and Swivel snuck past Boardband's 172, which remained unchanged, to end on 173, 174 and 174 respectively.
The score of Marigold, who was injured and unable to play, remained at 175.
Fester, who began the day in the lead on 176, shot a respectable 32 but was unable to improve his total score.
However, Attila's solid 34 enabled him to climb 4 points from 174 to 178 to win the 2022 GOTY!
Thus Fester was 2nd and Marigold was 3rd on 175.
Congratulations to Attila on a great campaign to win GOTY for the second time, following his maiden victory in this Major in 2015!
Well done too to Fester on his second consecutive 2nd place.
Excellent work too by Marigold for securing 3rd place.
Dick of the Day
This month, three candidates presented themselves for consideration.
They were Hoser for withdrawing from elfing, Orange Roughy for elfing incompetently and Suspect for attempting to bribe the Prez with beer for a late tee off and dropping out when your leader knocked him back and left him in the first flight based on his GOTY ranking.
With such strong candidates, your Prez decided to convene a kangaroo court on the Verandah to consult all Jimmies present about who should be declared Dick of the Day.
Jimmy's Jury noted that -
Suspect was not present;
Suspect had a record as long as your arm;
Neither Hoser nor Orange Roughy had offered any defense, preferring to throw themselves at the mercy of the court;
Hoser had at least played and had organized the prizes; and mmy
Orange Roughy had got up before dawn to elf, albeit incompetently and had also played.
The Jury was divided and at one stage the decision might have gone any of three ways.
So your Prez put it to a vote, which, after much loud debate, was swayed when, unsurprisingly Hoser and Orange Roughy voted against Suspect to tip the scales of justice against him!
It was therefore decreed that Suspect will need to wear the Dick of the Day medal throughout the next Jimmy's event that he attends until it is passed on to that Day's Dick.
LOTY 10
19 Jimmies imbibed, lunched and diced on the verandah as is our custom, with Ikea leaving before dice and the injured Marigold arriving specifically to see if he could dice his way into the final by securing his 5th consecutive non-loss.
The 4 dice losers were your Prez, Nadger, Write Off and Swivel.
Marigold succeeded in qualifying for the LOTY finals, bringing the number of finalists up to 8.
Leaderboards
After ELFY 10, GOTY 9 and LOTY 10, here are the JKGS 2022 leaderboards -
PLACE GOTY Points ELFY Points LOTY Final Qualifiers
1. Attila 178 Lurch 6.5 Broadband, Fester
2. Fester 176 Dumbo 5.0 Attila, Mangrove
3. Marigold 175 Road Rash 4.0 Lurch, Marigold
4. Chambermaid 174 Attila 4.0 Grease Nipple, Shrek
5. Shrek 173 Nadger 3.0
6. Broadband 172 Orange Roughy 3.0
Next up is LIABOS at Deep Water Bay in afternoon and evening of Saturday 20 May 2023
(Watch out for the Calling Notice)
Draw for foursomes partners
Foursomes, with only 3 clubs including putter
Putting Competition
LOTY Finals
Orchid Room Dinner
Major Prize Giving
Ladies Putting Competition for Biggus Dickus
President's Hand Over to President Elect
Cheers
President Dumbo
Well done Prez, great day to end the Fan LIng outings. Well done to Henry who played some great golf.